My Facelift!!

I thought I’ve give the blog a “facelift”!!! I adore anything pink…..and I mean anything. My dh thinks I own too much pink in my wardrobe….lol. AND when I “accidentially” wear pink on top AND bottom…..he calls me a “Pink Nightmare”!! He’s gonna love this facelift of mine….he’s going to say….”figures it’d be pink!” Speaking of which….time to change purses to my Guess one with the pink in it…LOL!! It is Spring around the corner ya know!!

Speaking of “Spring around the corner,” it is snowing and I mean snowing hard out as I type these words. We had tornado warnings 2 days this past week….TWO DAYS of them…..that is insane. One of the days was really awful. Myself and MM went to my MIL’s house and camped out in her cellar for the duration of the storm. Funny thing is….they have a potato bin (farmers in the family) and there is dirt on the top of it where the potatoes are first laid……lil Munchkin Man brought his magnet Thomas the Train down with him to Grandma’s and was in HEAVEN when he discovered the dirt! It was so stinkin’ funny that when the storm had passed and it was time to go home…..MM didn’t want to leave…you guessed it…..because he wanted to continue playing in the dirt!!! LOL…boys!!!!

The Food Battle continues……on and on and on. He’s is a presistent lil bugger. One of these days, he’ll try something new. Tonight we had Chicken ‘n Dumpling’s and he wouldn’t even try it. He shoved his plate away saying “It Stinks!!” Oh well…..BUT we have a rule that Dinner time is family time…..all of us stay at the table until the last person finishes their dinner. THEN and only then can anyone be excused. He despises this…..saying that if he’s not eating, he shouldn’t have to sit there. Guess again sweetie pie!

Daddy worked a bunch of hours over the past few days so it was just MM and myself at bedtime tonight. We read about 4-5 stories on the iPad/Kindle app. I love that I can view all my Kindle purchases on the iPad…..they’re in color! Woo Hoo!!! I’ve been reading all MM’s children’s books to him in black and white…..kinda reminds me of my childhood where we only had a black & white Television. I had to “guess” what color clothes ppl had on…..that was kinda fun actually….using my immagination. BUT once we got color…..holy cow…..the whole TV WORLD opened up, didn’t it!?

I kinda see MM like that…..when he first came home, he was in black & white…..he hardly smiled. He had a blank face..no emotion on it at all in a lot of the pictures I took. I imagined him in “color”…..full of laughter and vivid!!! Yes…that is it…VIVID.

Then as he’s grown and we’ve grown through this process…..I see him more in color now. He’s more VIVID…..more willing to let us in. He has a wonderful smile…..and so many of the pictures I take….have so much personality in them!!!!! By no means am I saying that we don’t have a ways to go yet….man o man do we ever!!! But we’re getting there…..step by baby step.

And just what is our “BIG DREAM?” Total healing for MM. For MM to be able to trust, to not be so incredibly fearful, to be able to let go and just love without worry, to dream…..those incredible dreams kiddos have.

My life….my purpose is for him…..for MM. I know that I must take care of myself so that I can take care of MM….yes. But I mean….that I stay up late at nights…searching for answers…..answers that will be the ONE…you know….the one that will help. The one that will be an “Aha!” I will try that and see if it works…and it does!! That is my goal. Each and every single day….every breath I take….is for my family whom I adore. I wouldn’t trade this life for any other…..God entrusted us with MM….He trusted we would do what is best by him…..and take care of him…..and find him the best counselor…..the best of everything. We try, and try and try. We also fall sometimes…..that is ok…..we pick ourselves up, forgive and carry on.

My Dream….is his dream……to be able to dream peacefully. To live peacefully. To love peacefully.

 

Blessings to you and your children…..

Mama249

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Yoga Anyone?

The food fight is still ongoing. Yeah……he’s stubborn, alright. But this Mama is not weak this time around……I’m still not going to give up on this. The last two nights Munchkin Man has refused to eat dinner. He pushes it away saying something like…”I’m not eating those nasty carrots or chicken!” I simply say, “Breakfast will be here in the morning, and by the way, don’t call my dinner ‘nasty’. It’s not polite to say that.”

I really don’t know what has gotten into me lately…..I have felt sluggish, tired and just downright blech. I truly feel it has to do with this extra weight I’m carrying unecessarily around, ya think! I’ve just felt so “blah”……like I’m a blob sitting here waiting for some miracle to happen and then wake up and it’s all been a dream…..and I’m skinny again!!! Wouldn’t that be sooo awesome!?

I’ve “magically” discovered that if I want to lose this extra weight, I’ve gotta get off my rump and do something about it. Gee….what took me so long to figure that one out…lol? I spoke with a friend of mine today and she stated that in the past 9 months, she’s lost 65 lbs and has managed to keep it off!! I’m so glad for her!!!! She gave me a great tip….drink lots and lots of water. Now, anyone who truly knows me….knows that I’m a true blue hard core Diet Dr. Pepper fan…..BIG TIME! You’ll be glad to know that I kicked that habit awhile back…..I no longer keep soda pop in the house AT ALL and only drink it when we go out for lunch/dinner. You should’ve seen me today……after I spoke with that friend of mine who recommended the water…..I think I must’ve drank about 10 glasses of water today!! LOL!!! She inspired me. Inspired me to actually do something about this…..rather than waiting for something to happen TO me…..I’ve got to DO something about it.

So…..a few weeks ago……or so……we ordered Netflix and while browsing the movie titles, I noticed they had some great exercise DVD’s to download and watch!! WOW…..Just what I needed!!! I was so excited. I thought….hhhhmmmm…..I’ve done some of these DVD’s before and never quite got much out of them…..HEY…..there’s Yoga…..never tried that before!! Now…first I tried this one Yoga called “10 Minute Yoga” something or other…..and it was HARD to do….but I stuck with it for that first week or less. I started reading the reviews (I know….I did it backwards…..I read the reviews AFTER I started the program…DUH) and found out that this particular one was NOT for beginners….Um…maybe that is why it was so hard on me. LOL!

I searched for a Yoga program more fitting to my needs. You see, I have Fibromyalgia and Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy which both cause LOTS of chronic pain. My Pain Mgmt Dr. recommended I do Yoga at my last visit as it would not only strengthen my body, but would actually help me to feel better (pain-wise). I wasn’t so sure I agreed at the time…..funny how we do that, huh? We pay our Dr’s to help us and then we don’t listen to them…..what is that all about? Anyways…..back to my search for a better Yoga program. I found one that is specifically FOR ppl with chronic pain and ppl who suffer common conditions…such as diabeties (which I don’t), weight-management (yes…I “suffer” with that), etc. This program, after pre-viewing it to see if it would fit my needs…..goes much slower and is more intuned with those who are in pain…..GREAT!! I finally found what I was looking for!! I gave it a whirl and haven’t looked back since! My son (MM) was always complaining when I would do my Yoga saying it took away from our time together…..he was getting a bit jealous I think….that I wasn’t keeping constant attention on him…which I don’t do anyways…..I give him SO MUCH but not constant. Then we sat down and had a little chat about it. I explained to MM that Mommy doesn’t get to play some things with him that he wants to because of my pain levels…..he said, yes, he knows that. Then I went on to explain that in doing Yoga, I’ll hopefully get feeling a lot better and be more able to do those things with him. BOY….he got so excited and told me to go do my Yoga!!! LOLOLOL!!!!!

Every day I get a bit more and more further along in the program…..able to go longer….as I’m learning and stretching those muscles that haven’t been used in a long stinkin’ time. I do have to say, though…..I honestly DO FEEL a lot better! I have lost about 6 lbs already (but gained a few back too) and my pain levels aren’t such that I cannot get down on the floor with MM for very long like it used to be. I’m sitting on the floor with him, playing and laughing with MM…we have so much more fun together because I’m taking better care of myself. I can actually feel myself getting more and more limber each day….a bit more even if only a tiny bit….so that I can be a better Mama to MM.

My point in writing about this? I have learned that in order to be a better Mama, I NEED to take better care of my health! It is vital in not only for ME….but especially for Munchkin Man….as he’s so worth all that stretching and Downward Facing Dog’s I do daily!!!!! When I get feeling like “I just simply don’t “feel” like it today…..” I think about MM….look into his sweet brown eyes……and say to myself…..how can I fail him by NOT taking care of myself!? I am a new person! I’m stronger…..and I’m more determined to succeed in this program!

What kinds of things have you promised to yourself to make YOU a better Mama? And what are YOU doing about it? Please share!!

BTW….today is Leap Day (Leap Year)…..My great-grandma’s birthday! She’s long gone to heaven, but I think of her a lot on this day. She was a kind soul. She could only speak broken-English (she was full-blooded Hungarian) and I remember vividly listening to her intently with wonder trying to figure out what she was saying. I found her so intriguing! I would sit at her feet or next to her and would watch her eyes (oh how they would glisten when she spoke) and would watch her mouth make shapes and sounds that were foreign to me…..I would imagine what she was saying…..Naturally it was always the most loving and wonderful things!! Happy Birthday, Great-Grandma…..You’re always in my heart, always in my thoughts….until I see you again…..XOXO!!

Blessings to you and your children……

Mama249

Giving….This is the time to Give!

It’s been a bit since I’ve posted…..I had a couple tests done last week to see if I can withstand surgery soon…..and have yet to receive the results. I’m actually kinda glad I don’t have the results yet because this gives me more time to ponder, to pray and to question whether or not the risk is worth it. I had a Myleogram test and they say you can get a bad headache from the test…..yep……sure did! I have had this migrane since last Monday! It’s had its time in my head….now it can kindly go away!

The last time I posted, I said that we were in a food battle with MM. Well, in the beginning…..it was tough and he went a couple days without eating dinner. But then, as if something in him just clicked, one night he decided to “try” what I ‘d made (Italian Meatballs) and he actually liked it. The funny thing is……the next day, he told his daddy that he “hoped we were having meatballs again tonight!” I cannot belive this is the same kiddo from a few weeks ago…..the very same kiddo who would cry and scream about having to try something new……the same kiddo that would refuse anything if it “looked” like it didn’t taste right….or if the moon wasn’t in perfect alignment with the 2nd star on the right….oh geez….who knows what made him tick. But it is working!!!!! We’ve stuck to our guns…..we refused to give in…..and he is now eating what we’re eating…..not completely yet as tonight we had shrimp and rice on the side. He ate the rice only. But he ate. YES!!!!!!

Today is a special day……it’s

I grew up down south……where Mardi Gras is a HUGE thing…..I’ve done New Orleans Mardi Gras (once) and it was a blast. But I grew up where we had the parades, the King Cakes, you name it…..if it had to do with Mardi Gras…..we did it (if if was clean that is). For those of you who need a refresher…..today is Shrove Tuesday….Mardi Gras……Fat Tuesday. Whatever ppl call it…..it all means the same thing…..the day before Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) where you can indulge before you must sacrifice in preparation for Lent which leads to Easter Sunday or Resurrection Sunday…..the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior. Typically people “give up” something for Lent…..I say…..don’t give up….but rather GIVE….give of your time, give of your resources, give more prayer time……just give. There are so many ppl starving for so much…….and we have the power within us to GIVE.

What are you going to give?

Blessings to you and your children…..

Mama249

Crazy Lying…Boy They Weren’t Kidding When They Said it was CRAZY!!

MM has been doing a lot of lying lately…..well, not just lately…..but it has been increasing lately. Today was such as one of those days.

He was playing on my iPhone, which he’s allowed to do as long as I’m nearby. I mean, they are expensive, I don’t want it dropped as well, I want to keep an eye on him & keep watch over what he’s doing on the gadget. He mostly plays “Angry Birds” and “Cut the Rope” along with a string of other things…..educational and just plain fun games. NO BIG DEAL, right? Right.

Well, he was playing along while I was catching up on Facebook, and checking out my e-mails. I looked back at him, lying on the couch, and asked, “What are you playing?”

He replied, “Angry Birds.”

I said, “Oh how neat,” and proceeded to get out of my chair and go over to him to engage in some conversation. NO BIG DEAL.

He immediately hid the iPhone under the sofa cushions.

“Why are you hiding my phone?” I asked, very confused actually.

“I don’t know,” he stated.

“What are you playing?” was my very next question because it sure didn’t “SOUND” like “Angry Birds.”

“Nothing!” he said emphatically, as if I had NO RIGHT to ask.

“Give me my phone, NOW!”

He reluctantly handed my phone to me but first…..he turned the iPhone off thinking I’d not see what he was doing. BUT the lil bugger, in all his worriedness, turned it off incorrectly. YEAH, Score for mom!!

I turned it back on and saw that it was…….

get this…….

PBS Kids videos.

Oh the horror!! Why on God’s green earth would a 4 yr old hide that? I asked myself and him for that matter.

He couldn’t anwer me.

Or wouldn’t.

I had the words of Bryan Post ringing in my head and it was saying……”Ignore the lie, not the child.”

So I let it be for awhile. Told dh about the situation and said we’d have to figure out what consequences would be and go from there.

Later that evening, after dinner, when all was calm and we were playing…..I asked him again, “Why did you tell me that you were watching ‘Angry Birds’ when in fact you were watching PBS Kids Videos?”

“You know, that makes mommy and daddy sad when you tell lies to us. It makes us not able to believe you. When you do tell us the truth we may not believe you because you’ve told so many lies.”

“I’m sorry, mommy,” he muttered.

He honestly could not come up with a reason why he did it. He kept saying he didn’t know why he did it.

I was talking to a great, wonderful and insightful friend of mine tonight, after MM had gone to bed, and told her the situation.

She said, “Oh yes, crazy lying. That is common.”

I KNOW THIS…..I had not seen it though….I was too busy thinking of the WHY he did it……and thinking of the HOW could he. That is what gets us mamas and daddys in trouble with this…..I didn’t listen to Bryan Post at all. It didn’t sink into my very depths.

As soon as my friend said, “Crazy Lying,” I got it…….I totally got it. It is not premissable, no way, but it is something that RAD kiddos typically do, lying for no apparent reason.

Now, how do I show MM that lying is not the way? I show him by examples in my own life. I teach him how to be truthful. I will post more on this later this week……I’ll let ya’ll know what we did to help MM know that lying is not permissable.

So, from now on……believe me……I’ll write it on my heart…..”Ignore the lie, not the child.”

Thank you, Bryan Post…..you rock.

Blessings to you and your children…..

Mama249

It’s a Food Fight, Baby!!!

It wasn’t until recently that my “feeble” (lol) mind has realized something. Hard to believe, I know. My son has complete control when it comes to food issues. Phew, there, I said it…..it’s off my chest. I’m a bit ashamed about it too……but wallowing in that isn’t going to fix it.

This is a game to MM. He was holding the control……remote control as you will. He’d push the buttons that he wanted to go his way……I’m speaking of meal times. It’s funny, too, because I’ve always been “careful” of not letting him have the control.

Here’s what happened to us…..so it doesn’t happen to you too. MM was diagnosed with SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder). He has a difficult time with loud noises. He’s a sensory “SEEKER” that will constantly be jumping on the furniture, running into walls, you name it, he does it. One thing I’ve noticed and don’t really do “anything” about because I feel he must NEED the extra sensory input is that he’ll walk on his toes…..but not just the run of the mill, walk on his toes…which he does do….but he will bend his toes downward and walk on the folded up toes…..I truly have no idea how better to explain it…..I’ll have to post a pic sometime. I’ve NEVER seen anything like it and neither has MM’s counselor. Anyways…..I have always thought his troubles with food were all related to his SPD. WRONG! I see that now. 

I was talking to a wonderful and very dear friend of mine who has walked this road before and whose daughter is on the path to complete healing!!! (YEAH!!! WAY TO GO!) She stated that MM sounds like he’s “very good at controlling food issues in our home.” That  is one of the many things I love about this friend of mine, she tells it like it is. No pulling the wool over your eyes, she’s amazing and I’m blessed to have her friendship. Back to MM…..when she stated this to me….last night as a matter of fact…..I knew in my heart of hearts that she was right on the money! How could we have let him do this? Well, easily….very easily! I got caught up in the not wanting a tantrum every single time we eat……OH……and I MUST mention this…..the LAST time we tried to “Make” him eat what we were eating, he stopped eating all together for NINE days!!!!! Nothing….I mean, NOTHING…..he ate nothing! He did drink so I wasn’t worried about dehydration. On the 9th night….I made Hamburger Helper…..he finally ate again. I was so worried about him the entire time, naturally. I’m telling you, this kiddo is stubborn!

Well, not wanting a repeat of the NINE DAY ordeal……I caved, we caved. I made seperate meals for MM and always (almost anyways) gave him 2 choices of what he was to eat. He couldn’t waver from the 2 choices……and I seriously THOUGHT I was doing good by him. BUT BUT BUT…..he still had the control at the end of the day when you really look at it. Last night, for example, I made Homemade Chicken Noodle Soup…..YUMMY….and set aside some noodles for MM. He arrived at the table and the look on his face was remarkable, as if I’d taken his breath away! Lost his best friend. You get the picture. He started freaking out, saying that he was NOT GOING TO EAT this!! He was trying to engage us in a battle. And you know what……that will be the LAST battle I’ll have with him…..I must if he’s going to heal!!

                                                                                                                                                                           

Today is a new day!!!! A day for real healing!!!!!! Lunch time came and I didn’t even tell him that I was fixing lunch. I just made it and put it on the table, called him to the table and waited to see what ensued. At first, MM was whining and pushing himself into me (which is what he does when he is whining and wants something I’m saying no to). I clearly and calmly stated that lunch was on the table (only 1 TBS of each item and when he finishes that…..he may have whatever he wants more of from his plate but doesn’t have to eat everything again) and when he finished ALL of it, he could have more mac-n-cheese. The other item on his plate was a chicken nugget in a kid-friendly shape…..which he always FLAT OUT REFUSES TO EAT! I never said another word. I ignored his “pleas”…..I went about my work in the kitchen. Then the MOST AMAZING thing of all happened…..something I NEVER expected!!!! He actually stopped whining, went to the table on his own and ate every single bite!!!! You go MM!!! I was so proud!!!!!! He stated he didn’t want seconds of anything though.

I thought, gee, it can’t possibly be THIS easy can it? NOPE…..along came dinner which I KNEW was going to be a TOUGH battle. I had left-over Home Made Chicken Noodle Soup (with carrots and celery mind you)! I also made him a grilled cheese in the shape of stars (I gave him only ONE of the 3 shapes). I knew he’d eat the grilled cheese, but the soup, no way. I was correct, too. He threw a heck of a fit……complete with pushing the table away! He kept yelling at me to “Take that nasty soup away from me! Why did you MAKE something that you KNOW I won’t eat!?” Stuff like that, but constantly!!! I went about eating my dinner. I calmly told MM that I was almost finished and he needed to figure out what he was going to do…..dinner would be over when I am finished tonight. I looked lovingly at him……and calmly said……”ssssshhhhh, it’s ok. I’m here for you. I won’t leave you. You can trust me.” He immediately calmed down and ate the single star grilled cheese….ONLY. He flat out refused the soup. That is fine……he’s learning…and will CONTINUE to learn as I won’t back down this time. I want my (our) son to heal and he can’t possibly heal if he’s feeling so out of control and yet that he has to control his environment. That is a tough pill to swallow…for anyone……especially a 4 year old who’s suffered trauma. He should be being a kiddo. He shouldn’t have to worry about these things. It’s high time I take the bull by the ring and do what I’m supposed to do….be the one in Control…..so that he doesn’t feel like he has to.

Blessings to you and your children…..

Mama249                                                                                       We don’t need any more of this, now do we??

How do you handle this very thing in your homes? Thanks for your input!!!!

Shadow or Not? That is the Question…..

Today is finally here…..the day that Puxatawney Phil longs for…..the only day he “works” in 365 days!! All of America is watching you lil fur ball.

What will you see?

I know what I’m hoping for!!!! A short winter and the way the weather has been going……it appears that may be possible!! Come on, Phil……dish!! What’s it gonna be??

Belssings to you and your children…..

Mama249