MM has been doing a lot of lying lately…..well, not just lately…..but it has been increasing lately. Today was such as one of those days.
He was playing on my iPhone, which he’s allowed to do as long as I’m nearby. I mean, they are expensive, I don’t want it dropped as well, I want to keep an eye on him & keep watch over what he’s doing on the gadget. He mostly plays “Angry Birds” and “Cut the Rope” along with a string of other things…..educational and just plain fun games. NO BIG DEAL, right? Right.
Well, he was playing along while I was catching up on Facebook, and checking out my e-mails. I looked back at him, lying on the couch, and asked, “What are you playing?”
He replied, “Angry Birds.”
I said, “Oh how neat,” and proceeded to get out of my chair and go over to him to engage in some conversation. NO BIG DEAL.
He immediately hid the iPhone under the sofa cushions.
“Why are you hiding my phone?” I asked, very confused actually.
“I don’t know,” he stated.
“What are you playing?” was my very next question because it sure didn’t “SOUND” like “Angry Birds.”
“Nothing!” he said emphatically, as if I had NO RIGHT to ask.
“Give me my phone, NOW!”
He reluctantly handed my phone to me but first…..he turned the iPhone off thinking I’d not see what he was doing. BUT the lil bugger, in all his worriedness, turned it off incorrectly. YEAH, Score for mom!!
I turned it back on and saw that it was…….
PBS Kids videos.
Oh the horror!! Why on God’s green earth would a 4 yr old hide that? I asked myself and him for that matter.
He couldn’t anwer me.
I had the words of Bryan Post ringing in my head and it was saying……”Ignore the lie, not the child.”
So I let it be for awhile. Told dh about the situation and said we’d have to figure out what consequences would be and go from there.
Later that evening, after dinner, when all was calm and we were playing…..I asked him again, “Why did you tell me that you were watching ‘Angry Birds’ when in fact you were watching PBS Kids Videos?”
“You know, that makes mommy and daddy sad when you tell lies to us. It makes us not able to believe you. When you do tell us the truth we may not believe you because you’ve told so many lies.”
“I’m sorry, mommy,” he muttered.
He honestly could not come up with a reason why he did it. He kept saying he didn’t know why he did it.
I was talking to a great, wonderful and insightful friend of mine tonight, after MM had gone to bed, and told her the situation.
She said, “Oh yes, crazy lying. That is common.”
I KNOW THIS…..I had not seen it though….I was too busy thinking of the WHY he did it……and thinking of the HOW could he. That is what gets us mamas and daddys in trouble with this…..I didn’t listen to Bryan Post at all. It didn’t sink into my very depths.
As soon as my friend said, “Crazy Lying,” I got it…….I totally got it. It is not premissable, no way, but it is something that RAD kiddos typically do, lying for no apparent reason.
Now, how do I show MM that lying is not the way? I show him by examples in my own life. I teach him how to be truthful. I will post more on this later this week……I’ll let ya’ll know what we did to help MM know that lying is not permissable.
So, from now on……believe me……I’ll write it on my heart…..”Ignore the lie, not the child.”
Thank you, Bryan Post…..you rock.
Blessings to you and your children…..