Post-Christmas: The Aftermath

Well, how did you fare for Christmas? Were your kiddos overwhelmed? Was it chaos? Was it better than you expected…..or was it exactly as you suspected….or worse? I’ve a story to tell……as usual.

First of all, I told ya’ll in my last post that I had recently undergone  surgery and am not allowed to lift MM for 6 weeks post surgery…..HOW, I ask, am I supposed to do that? We use the holding technique when he rages….let alone, holding for boo-boos, and especially holding for letting him know that mommy just loves him to pieces AND every night I hold him to help get him to sleep. Now, how do I stop all that…to tell a 4 year old, gosh, honey…..mommy just can’t do it for quite some time. Nope….he won’t understand. Not one iota!! And you know what? I was right….he didn’t understand.

Now…fast forward to last week. I have been experiencing some incredible amounts of pain (no…this post is not going to be completely about this subject…so you can read on if you’re interested in other than my surgery…LOL). One particular day, myself, dh and my MIL were taking MM to a local bounce house, and stopped to get something to eat first. Hey….can’t bounce without a completely full belly so one can experience the feeling of losing your stomach, right?! Oh, you mean that is just me? Anyways…..I cried and cried on the way to lunch… tremendous amounts of pain. Dh was really getting worried as was I….so I called my Dr.’s office. They said to get to the ER immediately. Well, “immediately” to me was AFTER we filled our bellies….we “were” hungry after all. Found out it was something to really keep an eye on from the surgery that went wrong…..not terribly wrong….just wrong.

Just telling you the above story to let you know how stressful the week was!! And how little I was able to do and am still not able to do. The pain continues. I go back to the Dr. this week to see what our next step is. Ho hum.

Now…..CHRISTMAS!!!! Wow…was that ever so cool, or what?! My MM is finally at that age where he REALLY gets it….and is super excited about it!! He woke up at, no kidding here….12:30 AM and said, “mommy, is it Christmas yet?”  Darned cute as a bug!! Dh and I had JUST, and I mean “JUST” put out the gifts… we ran to our room (he co-sleeps with us part of the night) to make sure he didn’t get up and proceeded to let him know that, Nope, Santa hadn’t made it yet….get back to sleep. He then, closed his eyes as tight as they could possibly be!! LOL!!

6:55AM rolls around and MM wakes again….this time, it’s a much more reasonable time frame….I can really deal with 6:55 MUCH better than 12:30 am!! He ran into the living room and he literally jumped up and down and his eyes were as big as saucers!! I fed off his excitement!! It is so refreshing to see and feel that much wonder and excitement, ya know. He started “rip, rarin’ and tearin” into the gifts……in a process that only a 4 yr old can do. We had to remind him to calm down and take it a bit slower. Other than that….he honestly did very very well!!!! I was very proud of him….the sensory stuff wasn’t too much for him…..yet.

He LOVES and ADORES Thomas the Train….and Santa, Mama and Daddy got him I think everything that is Thomas possible!! He and daddy made some awesome tracks!! I love that he can actually “SEE” what isn’t there… you understand what I’m trying to say? MM is amazing at puzzles……he finishes them quickly….he can do tracks…long and amazing train tracks that are kinda complicated….in no time flat….and he has this uncanny ability to figure things out in his head. It amazes me. No….rather…..HE amazes me!!!

Well, the day wears on and MM is playing, playing and playing with the trains and train tracks ALL stinkin’ day while I’m cooking for our family dinner at 4. We get to the Nephew’s house and MM is getting to the point that he’s getting overwhelmed. I can tell. He’s getting very very very antsy. We can’t NOT go, I mean it’s Christmas, ya know. It’s family and we’re all expected to be there. BUT, under no uncertain terms….IF MM were having a really rough time….I’d put my foot down. Dh…..feels differntly though….that is where we falter. We’re pretty much on the same page, besides a few small things….and that is one of them. Here’s another….and to me… bothers me a lot.

Dh will NOT tell his family about MM’s RAD or SPD. He feels it’s MM’s story to tell….gosh, he’s 4 and doesn’t even know it actually himself…so, he’s supposed to tell the family about it when he himself doesn’t have a name to it? I TOTALLY disagree!!!! I say, the family… least Dh’s mom, who babysits for us once in awhile, should know, so she knows what she’s dealing with when MM rages at her house. Well…..MM started to unravel at the nephew’s house….and nephew’s mom started getting onto MM…..I don’t like that at all….He’s our son…..let us take care of that, ok. If it’s important…yeah, say something….but I don’t tell her grandson what to do or not do simply out of respect. Then Nephew’s mom says to the others at the dinner….”Gosh, MM ‘really’ is having a time today! He must be behaving badly because Christmas is just getting to be too much for him!” (or something to that effect) It kills me when ppl (especially family) talk about MM in front of him…like he doesn’t hear them. No…..I didn’t say anything to her. I left it alone…..but I did take MM aside and talk to him alone. I refuse to embarrase him in front of ppl….what we have to say, can be done in private so as not to shame him.

After I spoke with MM, he sorta, and I do mean sorta…..calmed down a tad. He really was overwhelmed today! It is a lot of stimulus all around and add in all the family surrounding him and talking and talking…..that is brain overload, ya know!!! I did my best to keep him occupied and focused. That, alone, did wonders for him. What kind of things did you do with your kiddos to keep them regulated for the holidays? Oh….btw….the nephew has a son who’s only about 15 months or so old. And MM doesn’t like babies….at all. He loves his cousin… a degree… much as he can tolerate him….but at a distance really. MM has a hard time with kiddos who aren’t at his “level”……what about your kiddos? Are they the same? Different?

The aftermath of the holidays……peace has arrived once again….we arrived to a quiet house after dinner and played with trains until bedtime last night……and now it’s morning…..peaceful quietness……MM is still resting quietly……somberly…..while I await his roar of excitement to this day!!!! Bring it on!!!

(This is not a picture of my child.)

Blessings to you and your children,

Mama 249



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