A bit more than a year ago, dh, myself and MM went on vacation for our anniversary. We went to a lovely place….a place we try to go to at least once a year! A place we just adore. One evening, we all went to a pretty “well-known” establishment (I won’t say where to save face for the said establisment) and were walking around in amazement, having a wonderful time.
Dh and MM went off on their own while I window shopped around a bit. Now, I won’t mince words here…MM was being a bit loud in his excitement, but in no way was he being rude, or was he causing a problem and I’m not saying that because I’m his Mama….I’m the first to say if he’s causing a problem. I was in another section of the establishment and 2 lady workers were chatting it up while “working.” Then, to my amazement, one of the employees said to the other, while referring to my son and not realizing he belonged to me, “Now, THAT is why they have DayCares! Leave them there, ya know!”
I ALMOST went to her and said something. But no. I’m not usually one to cause a scene….mostly because I get lost in my words and want to say the right thing plus I HATE confrontations anyways. I immediately went to dh so she could see he was WITH ME…..maybe that would give her the hint that she misspoke. I told dh of her “opinion” of our son. He was furious, to say the least! “That’s it, we’re leaving right now! Put your stuff down. We will NOT purchase anything from them if that is the kind of ppl they hire!” I disagreed because the store, while being responsible, yes, for hiring ppl of quality to represent their establishment, cannot, CANNOT, be held responsible for what comes out of an employees mouth. Now….I do agree that it makes them look bad…yes. But responsible, no.
Dh was still furious and we left without our merchandise. I hate to say it….but it put a damper on the rest of the evening because dh couldn’t get it out of his head what was said about OUR son. Now, mind you, at the time, we were unaware of his RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder) & his SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder), but still, I assure you….he was just so excited….most likely sensory overload and couldn’t be quiet…..not screaming…..just loud. Saying things such as, “Wow, daddy, look at THAT!!”
When we got back home….a few days passed and it was nagging at me about what had happened back at the “well-known establishment.” I decided to give the manager a call…..now that my head was clear I could say the right things, calmly, ya know. She was so kind, and apologetic. She was going to get to the bottom of this, she stated. She sent us a gift card to use either online or next time we visit. Along with it a letter stating she spoke with the two women involved, reprimanded them, and used this story as an example of what NOT to do in her next meeting. No….they didn’t get fired…..or lose days without pay….just were told what is appropriate to say and not to say. That is all I wanted to happen….so another family wouldn’t go through this as we did.
Looking back after more than a year has passed, and I still have yet to use the gift card, I have had ppl say things about our son…..which I will post about at a later time…..things that have cut deeply, that hurt my heart….things that I hope and pray Munchkin Man didn’t hear…..and realized even moreso that I’m his advocate! I’M the one who has to step up to the plate for him while he’s so little yet….not necessarily to shield him….because the world is a cruel place and he’ll experience much, needing some thick skin……but rather to TEACH him that he’s ok. That ppl can and will be cruel to even the best of us…..and how to handle those moments. To not let those moments get him down on himself….or to let those ppl’s judgements shape who he is…..no way! To let him stand tall in the face of adversity and know deep in his heart of hearts, that he was made good by God….and that there’s a plan for him. My deepest want for MM is this……to have him be able to regulate himself and be able to healed of the RAD & SPD…..to live the life that God has laid out for him..and for him to be content and peace fulfilled with his life. Is that asking too much?
Blessings to you and your children….