I started to read one book…..which was a bit harsh for me and my personality. And before anyone says it….I know this healing is NOT about me….but if the dynamics of the method are so not us, and are totally against what I believe, how can I use those methods if I don’t truly FEEL them, BELIEVE them? I can’t…I simply can’t. I returned the book and bought something else. That is where Becky A. Bailey comes in
The book, “Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline” by Becky A. Bailey was one that came recommended in a group that I belong to. I went to Mrs. Bailey’s site and watched some of her You Tube videos and they all made so much sense. I read the reviews and made the plunge….I bought the book on Amazon for my Kindle. Now….there are pluses and minuses to having it on my Kindle…..I can get to it anytime I want as all the books are cataloged in the Kindle…..and the Kindle stays right where you left off. BUT the big minus in my book is looking something up…I CAN in fact bookmark and highlight things of interest which makes a separate document of highlights from that particular book…..but it just isn’t the same as picking up the book and re-reading a particular part that I need to refer to. BUT I LOVE my Kindle!! AND, I must say.,…..there might be a way and I just don’t know it yet, LOL.
In this book, Becky A. Bailey states that, “Teaching is about giving. Control is about getting.” Boy is that ever true. If I try to control MM, I’m going to get results but I don’t want a dictatorship here and I don’t believe I’ll get true healing on his part….he’d just be acting so as to defer reactions from me and daddy. That isn’t healing in my book. Becky also states that, “…whatever I teach, I learn. at every moment, you teach other people and reinforce in yourself who your sense of who you are, and what other people mean to you. Teaching and learning are actually the same.” We teach our children by OUR OWN actions….for example, she stated that when someone cuts you off in traffic and you react adversly, you are stating that certain ppl deserve no respect and that ppl who make mistakes can be condemned. We are actually teaching our children to fear, hate, and struggle against things that don’t go their way. OR we can teach them that all people deserve and should be treated with respect! Boy, am I guilty of the getting upset when someone cuts me off in traffic. I never thought of it as actually teaching MM those things…but she’s exactly right!!
You know, when I teach MM that some ppl don’t deserve respect…..he probably feels like he’s one of those ppl too. He already has a very low self-esteem…so why not feel that way? That is sad that I’m adding to it without even realizing it. Mistakes can be condemned….wow…that means that MM feels (most likely because of my actions adding to this) like his mistakes are looked at by me as something I’d feel “less than” or that I’d honk at him if he were a car…you get what I’m saying? That in itself makes me feel crappy! But….now I know, so I won’t be doing that anymore!
I know that I haven’t gotten through this book yet…..but so far so good and I highly recommend this book to all!! Thumbs up to Becky A. Bailey…she definately rocks this house!!!!
Blessings to you and your children…